mercy

"I est un jeu pour vous encore pardonné you.can vous supporter?"

"i was a game for you still forgave you.can you bear it?"

I Love You....

I surrender to you when you pressed me to your chest

Forgive me for the sadness and the bringing of you down

I just needed love, I needed a friend,I needed you

and there you were running from forever like all the rest

Three simple words bled me dry

Three simple words bled us dry

I love you....

Prayer

Ocean waves wash my soul ,

cleanse me of your smile and the memory,

Of ten fingers entwined forever in a hopeless wish........

You....

Sometimes along the dark glistening aura of night, my heart loosens slowly.Reminders of you always stays fresh even in murky ponds of suffocating emotions.Like everyday you wake me in the morning,when the sun shines again.after along period of desolution.It's frightening when all I know falls apart.And all I know is you.Hunger squeezes me tighter.My soul sags with exhaustion.Ashtrays fill with sleepless nights.Weeping intensifies my anxiety.Can tomorrow come without you...here today?The cheap chandelier falls on my face.The rose filled lamp explodes in my hands.Pain is unrecognizable.All I knew was you.You. My love. and you left on one saturday.

colour

Bless me of so that my blood turns black. Bless me so i fall to darkness.

the unending enchanting night allures me to let my darkness flow from all my arteries, through all my veins. i demise life. i forgive you. i am blessed for the dark.

your eyes....

When I look at your eyes, I see your true self.I see you're sweet, and caring.
I see you're giving and forgiving.I see your love for me.
When I look at your eyes I stop myself from crying.
When I'm alone and think about your eyes I cry.
I can't stop thinking that one day I'll never see those eyes again.
That I'll never see the love or the sweetness Or the love that makes you who you are.
One day you'll be gone - gone from me.
Gone from this world.
No matter what happens, those eyes will one day close
And forever rest in peace.But you'll never be completely gone,
Because every time I close my eyes,There you will be....i will live with your soul...

Bless me..

I could look at a burning candle forever. Even feel my life
wasting with its melting wax. My sick laughter as I dip my finger
tips into the blistering pool.. I'm actually amused at the burning
sting that takes over this nothingness. Reminding me that I still
can FEEL.

you came to me as silently in a lonesome hour.i saw you smiling at me when none did the same.you wept away crystals while holding me close,i still feel your breath and warmth on my chest . How do i get you out of my mind?Out of my soul?, Out of my body?Each moment with you occupies every cell within me I don't just love you...i feel you alive in me, how do i forget you?? by killing you or myself??Guess that's the only way...I've to die too .Get you out of my mortal existence but what about the aura around my dead body?Can you put and end to that too?
Deathwish peered into my eyes with conviction,you gave me petals of iron to draw patterns in crimson.your hand upon mine, we began to use them against my heart till it bleed
Deathwish you leaned over me for a kiss farewell.painting my charms with scriptures, Force the darkness unto me,pierce my soul apart and wish me life in hell.

epitaph...

A wreath is ecclesiastical on my head, preaching me of its inevitable symmetry and unyielding diligence. A foreseeable perdition of what is yet to come, and how life will end with no regard of how it withered to ash and dust. "You believe the eyes only venture once when lastly glazed, as I take you under my wings of eternal slumber. But I am in every dismal face, devouring pieces of the fragile soul. I take your pain onto me; your mortal loss is solely my gain. Into my hollow valley, you find your remains. So why fear me as life passes you by if the moment you're born you begin to die?"i envy you of your power. the power of yours to rule over me.

The abstract you...my life.

As we pass through the numerous crossroads of life we come across many who accompany us in this journey of myriad experiences. Underlying this is a resonance, a chord which strikes between me and your abstract beauty.relation between you and me which never can be defined.

Among the darkest nights i find myself into the incandescent light consumed By the lean and famished moon;A sweeping typhoon, I am befallen to the thin air .Whose lulling dissipates with clandestine fog.Suspect nothing but the barren log-Shelter, solace, I spotted thee Aghast within the perpetual distance And growing farther by the reminiscence. Effrevescent daggers lunged at the blue colossus,"Thy blood lies, but the fruit of mine own Toil and passed stone thousand burdens burning brightly,Efface from my peripheral sight!"The swipes were beholden from a boisterous hand, Striking flesh upon the Tattered's command. i lament betwixt subtle seas for only the pride in myheart for you. Desire to lie in the brazen bone Of centuries holding you close to my heart hence condoned. I shot back the vacant, cold stare which stood lifeless as my inability to snatch you from destiny .Whence faces drew the irein, my self-perpetuated fire ,to bare the calling towards the blackest abyss ,as my body curls heavyly with the ground.i just want your lips to touch mine just for my last mortal kiss. for i shall live for eternity blesssed by your love.

silence and solitude

Koto anuranan, koto spondon,Koto jigyasha, koto bhalobasha.

Somoy egiye jaye, jibon kete jaaye.

smriti aar bismriti hoye jaaye ekakar

Ei jibon e koto anuronon, koto spondon.

I sometimes find I'm drifting,Through this life without any effect, often wonder if I'm truly worth what I've been blessed. I search through days that have been hard,To try to understand,The many trials that I have known,The life that I have had.

You see me in my daily grind,So confident and strong.Yet when everybody retires after the end of the day, when I am alone, I question Just where I belong.I often try too hard I find,To analyze and guess,To scrutinize, investigate about my life. i find no answer . Someday I will confess.For somewhere deeper, there must be some meaning to this life, Some way to make a difference,Give a reason for this quest. Is there some hidden meaning?Some agenda to be found?A greater purpose waiting If I care to hang for some more time?sometimes It teases and it taunts me,Always slightly out of sight,A hazy vision out of reach,Where darkness hides the light.I struggle to bring clarity,to what awaits me there, And yet this weak illusion always fades before my stare.It seems the harder that I try,To focus through the blurred, Just serves to add more questions,Through my endless, tired gaze.Perhaps I'm trying just too hard,To understand it all,For can we ever truly know just what we have in silence?Each incident, each moment passed,Just adds upon the next,But in the end, will I find truth ...Or will I be cursed?Perhaps I make it harder than it has to be sometimes,But will my searching bring to me my meaning over time?Or will it leave me broken and confused, as I feel now,While questions brings me just utter silence and solitude.

crimson lies

I'll stay here forever, blocking out the bright vivid colors of your lies. Ever will the touch of your flesh haunt me, the folds our blankets made in the darkness of the night, the thoughts we shared under the moonlight. Broken promises never intended to ever hurt a living soul so dear, ripping holes in my chest.Fresh blood everyday, oozing from my gapping wounds, trickling down my body causing my life to be a world of bloody lies,crimson with hate.The taste of you, forever lasting upon my tounge, i'm etching closer to that sweet smell of pain.now solitude is every thing to me,there's nothing more that I want...Wrap me in all coldness,hold me,don't stop until I’m gone...Let me feel your cold touch,feel you,feel pain all over my body...Release my soul from your existence.release my soul and curse me to darkness. Darkness falling down upon an open bleeding slab. Piercing through the night like nothing ever has .Slipping smoothly through all the cracks For which were never really known .A cold damp darkness that once felt can never be removed The dark of sadness that pierces ever wound .And as i crash upon a hollow ground,All i ever knew begins to fade beyond my sight Stealing away all happiness and joy from my eyes .This is a place where such a happiness cannot exist. A place where the darkness never loosens its strong grip.Where all hope of ever escaping is lost to an empty nothingness,Where the only thing that ever falls besides myself Is a storm of tears falling to an empty ground Forever falling through the night Without the smallest glimmer of sunshine A darkness only known by those who has been cursed by you and your crimson lies.

black..

It is this rain the responsible of my acts. I am animal that exceeds of the pure beings, i am a mist that runs over the wisdom without realizing. To destroy me it is necessary the truth, and to create me a lie, to love me it is necessary to come up to the infinite, and to hate me only it is necessary to understand my lament. It is the distress that fixes to itself in my chest the selfish suffering of an ignoramus, is the shade of what was defenseless and the cruel reality of those of my species. I am happy because at least I know my destination, nevertheless the cigars have it uncertain. I am wretched because I love what hurts me, a weak one because I leave myself to go of the lusts, a wise one because I know when to be quiet, absent-minded because it is easy to wrap me, useless because I have no reason to exist. Those who speak my language me will understand, but those who are of strange languages will have for that to wait. At the end of my sorrows, quite this when for ending, put to desist from my egocentrismo and to give up suddenly what I have inherited from the darkness. If I can see further than this barred up window, I can view all that is before me.Sometimes I cannot hear past the walls that are enclosing my surroundings.If I can feel the life infused within me again, will I truly be free?If I can signifiy my mood, I would not need words to descibe it.But when I'm out of my cell, I want you and everyone to see that i still survive.

porajoy

Jiboner kach thekey lenden bujhey niye premikar shobtuku bishash baji rekhey
Firay jabey shob hara ekjon ajratey, alo adharir chuye , firay jabey juar table ey ekjon bibagi,
aj sob porajoy mene niye,fire jabe ekjon bebagi

"james"

What's worse? Feeling pain, or feeling numb? Feeling that someone betrayed you or someone has forgotten you? I pick the latter choice of the two.Nothing is worst than being left with nothing. Nothing is worst than being left with 'everything'. Where should we stand? It's hell both ways, but even "hell" has degrees.Crying in anguish is so much better than crying in void. Seems like the walls have grown fists and now they're choking.The memories are gone. I tried to remember, but they were blurred, and I stuttered a thousand times trying to bring them to life. 'Yes, you're not my muse anymore, but you're a part of me and I don’t want to lose that.' I think I might have an advice to give on how to be 'insensitive'.

Abbhorent Desolation..

In the corner beside my window
There hangs a lonely photograph
There is no reason I'd never notice
A memory that could hold me back
There is a wound that's always bleeding
There is a road I'm always walking
And I know you'll never return to this place
Gone through days without talking
There is a comfort in silence
So used to losing all ambition
Struggling to maintain what's left
Once undone, there is only smoke
Burning in my eyes to blind
To cover up what really happened
Force the darkness unto me..Amen

She went away, and I'm here to stay, forever in this decaying cell. Trapped between myself and myself. And you ask me why my eyes would cry bitter blood tears. Why I would lament a god-willed state. A forfeit I shall be, and accept this as my fate.A wreath is ecclesiastical on my head, preaching me of its inevitable symmetry and unyielding diligence. A foreseeable perdition of what is yet to come, and how life will end with no regard of how it withered to ash and dust. "You believe the eyes only venture once when lastly glazed, as I take you under my wings of eternal slumber. But I am in every dismal face, devouring pieces of the fragile soul. I take your pain onto me; your mortal loss is solely my gain. Into my hollow valley, you find your remains. So why fear me as life passes you by if the moment you're born you begin to die?i suffer for you..

Tears....

After the lightened haze, she turned her head to be locked in a box of velvet bricks. Walls so thick, cannot hear the sobs of this wretched detachment — desolation bleeds out the eye. So cold, yet soothing; this deadly peace in which She abides. Her home of mirror loathing. A self-constructed castle of fabrications. Beyond are Smiles of paint, sighs of concealed impatience.
They say time passes quicker when you're happy. The laughter would carry it away, without brushing you with its breeze…and you simply would not notice. I suppose, if that's true, then time would be heavy and thick when you're sad.Yes, I agree… I don't know much about happiness –and that is because I tolerated being bleak- but I know that sadness is savored, not only felt…that is why some people would hang on to their heartrending memories. Another thing is … I don't think people can take pain for granted, but they seem to have a habit of doing just that with blissful moments. I felt time going slow once, now… even with the burdens I bear, time is going fast. What would that mean? …I'm just being the anomaly that I am? or that "my mask of sanity is about to slip".I don't know how things are moving too fast, but Death's Arrow runs faster than lightening...

Better to have loved and lost

They say "Better to have loved and lost", a condolence to a broken heart.I scorn their resignation… I say "better to never have loved, then you wouldn't have lost".When you're alone again, all you'd have is memories searing your senses, not empathizing with your loss. The sweet turns bitter, and the bitter turns worse… and you're left to struggle with the pain."Love" never gives the promise of forever. It's us who do all the talking, like you're bound to say what your mind sows for you, no matter how high it is with all the confusing frenzy.Then, when it’s all clear, you wake up with the worst hangover of your life, not knowing what hit you. Karma works its magic."Better to never have loved" …maybe the resignation is mine.