Distance

"The journey of our love is the distance between us "

solace.......

In this opium of solace and resolution, I stand and watch from this empty hollow restitution,And wonder what symptoms may follow through and beyond this restless dream,Can I not contain this any longer, the voices of suffering,I walk alone and build what little has and will remain,The anger and darkness of the abyss now consume the hate.A misinterpretation of sorrow may blind this festering wound.And it is the bleeding of heart that has left us here so suddenly so soon.Here the sanction of want may suffer the reality.Here alone it withers and dies without the fertility.The fertility of wisdom and the rule of authority.The meaning sold and taught without reason.The years pass as do the seasons.Why have you left me here, why now in this cold dark place.In this opium of solace and resolution without that longing embrace...

Rain Drops..

"Mio tesoro questa pioggia ha appesantito le nostre ali,dobbiamo solamente trovare un angolo per ripararci da essa,per asciugare le piume dei nostri sentimenti e della nostra anima.Allora capirai anche tu che il passato non è stato il nostro apice,per la prima volta vedrai quanto può essere meraviglioso volare insieme. "

"My darling this rain has weight down our own wings.we have just to find a place where we can take refuge from it,to dry the feathers of our feelings and our souls.So you'll see that past wasn't our top,for the first time you will see how wonderful is to fly away together with me."

mercy

"I est un jeu pour vous encore pardonné you.can vous supporter?"

"i was a game for you still forgave you.can you bear it?"

I Love You....

I surrender to you when you pressed me to your chest

Forgive me for the sadness and the bringing of you down

I just needed love, I needed a friend,I needed you

and there you were running from forever like all the rest

Three simple words bled me dry

Three simple words bled us dry

I love you....

Prayer

Ocean waves wash my soul ,

cleanse me of your smile and the memory,

Of ten fingers entwined forever in a hopeless wish........

You....

Sometimes along the dark glistening aura of night, my heart loosens slowly.Reminders of you always stays fresh even in murky ponds of suffocating emotions.Like everyday you wake me in the morning,when the sun shines again.after along period of desolution.It's frightening when all I know falls apart.And all I know is you.Hunger squeezes me tighter.My soul sags with exhaustion.Ashtrays fill with sleepless nights.Weeping intensifies my anxiety.Can tomorrow come without you...here today?The cheap chandelier falls on my face.The rose filled lamp explodes in my hands.Pain is unrecognizable.All I knew was you.You. My love. and you left on one saturday.

colour

Bless me of so that my blood turns black. Bless me so i fall to darkness.

the unending enchanting night allures me to let my darkness flow from all my arteries, through all my veins. i demise life. i forgive you. i am blessed for the dark.

your eyes....

When I look at your eyes, I see your true self.I see you're sweet, and caring.
I see you're giving and forgiving.I see your love for me.
When I look at your eyes I stop myself from crying.
When I'm alone and think about your eyes I cry.
I can't stop thinking that one day I'll never see those eyes again.
That I'll never see the love or the sweetness Or the love that makes you who you are.
One day you'll be gone - gone from me.
Gone from this world.
No matter what happens, those eyes will one day close
And forever rest in peace.But you'll never be completely gone,
Because every time I close my eyes,There you will be....i will live with your soul...

Bless me..

I could look at a burning candle forever. Even feel my life
wasting with its melting wax. My sick laughter as I dip my finger
tips into the blistering pool.. I'm actually amused at the burning
sting that takes over this nothingness. Reminding me that I still
can FEEL.

you came to me as silently in a lonesome hour.i saw you smiling at me when none did the same.you wept away crystals while holding me close,i still feel your breath and warmth on my chest . How do i get you out of my mind?Out of my soul?, Out of my body?Each moment with you occupies every cell within me I don't just love you...i feel you alive in me, how do i forget you?? by killing you or myself??Guess that's the only way...I've to die too .Get you out of my mortal existence but what about the aura around my dead body?Can you put and end to that too?
Deathwish peered into my eyes with conviction,you gave me petals of iron to draw patterns in crimson.your hand upon mine, we began to use them against my heart till it bleed
Deathwish you leaned over me for a kiss farewell.painting my charms with scriptures, Force the darkness unto me,pierce my soul apart and wish me life in hell.

epitaph...

A wreath is ecclesiastical on my head, preaching me of its inevitable symmetry and unyielding diligence. A foreseeable perdition of what is yet to come, and how life will end with no regard of how it withered to ash and dust. "You believe the eyes only venture once when lastly glazed, as I take you under my wings of eternal slumber. But I am in every dismal face, devouring pieces of the fragile soul. I take your pain onto me; your mortal loss is solely my gain. Into my hollow valley, you find your remains. So why fear me as life passes you by if the moment you're born you begin to die?"i envy you of your power. the power of yours to rule over me.

The abstract you...my life.

As we pass through the numerous crossroads of life we come across many who accompany us in this journey of myriad experiences. Underlying this is a resonance, a chord which strikes between me and your abstract beauty.relation between you and me which never can be defined.

Among the darkest nights i find myself into the incandescent light consumed By the lean and famished moon;A sweeping typhoon, I am befallen to the thin air .Whose lulling dissipates with clandestine fog.Suspect nothing but the barren log-Shelter, solace, I spotted thee Aghast within the perpetual distance And growing farther by the reminiscence. Effrevescent daggers lunged at the blue colossus,"Thy blood lies, but the fruit of mine own Toil and passed stone thousand burdens burning brightly,Efface from my peripheral sight!"The swipes were beholden from a boisterous hand, Striking flesh upon the Tattered's command. i lament betwixt subtle seas for only the pride in myheart for you. Desire to lie in the brazen bone Of centuries holding you close to my heart hence condoned. I shot back the vacant, cold stare which stood lifeless as my inability to snatch you from destiny .Whence faces drew the irein, my self-perpetuated fire ,to bare the calling towards the blackest abyss ,as my body curls heavyly with the ground.i just want your lips to touch mine just for my last mortal kiss. for i shall live for eternity blesssed by your love.

silence and solitude

Koto anuranan, koto spondon,Koto jigyasha, koto bhalobasha.

Somoy egiye jaye, jibon kete jaaye.

smriti aar bismriti hoye jaaye ekakar

Ei jibon e koto anuronon, koto spondon.

I sometimes find I'm drifting,Through this life without any effect, often wonder if I'm truly worth what I've been blessed. I search through days that have been hard,To try to understand,The many trials that I have known,The life that I have had.

You see me in my daily grind,So confident and strong.Yet when everybody retires after the end of the day, when I am alone, I question Just where I belong.I often try too hard I find,To analyze and guess,To scrutinize, investigate about my life. i find no answer . Someday I will confess.For somewhere deeper, there must be some meaning to this life, Some way to make a difference,Give a reason for this quest. Is there some hidden meaning?Some agenda to be found?A greater purpose waiting If I care to hang for some more time?sometimes It teases and it taunts me,Always slightly out of sight,A hazy vision out of reach,Where darkness hides the light.I struggle to bring clarity,to what awaits me there, And yet this weak illusion always fades before my stare.It seems the harder that I try,To focus through the blurred, Just serves to add more questions,Through my endless, tired gaze.Perhaps I'm trying just too hard,To understand it all,For can we ever truly know just what we have in silence?Each incident, each moment passed,Just adds upon the next,But in the end, will I find truth ...Or will I be cursed?Perhaps I make it harder than it has to be sometimes,But will my searching bring to me my meaning over time?Or will it leave me broken and confused, as I feel now,While questions brings me just utter silence and solitude.

crimson lies

I'll stay here forever, blocking out the bright vivid colors of your lies. Ever will the touch of your flesh haunt me, the folds our blankets made in the darkness of the night, the thoughts we shared under the moonlight. Broken promises never intended to ever hurt a living soul so dear, ripping holes in my chest.Fresh blood everyday, oozing from my gapping wounds, trickling down my body causing my life to be a world of bloody lies,crimson with hate.The taste of you, forever lasting upon my tounge, i'm etching closer to that sweet smell of pain.now solitude is every thing to me,there's nothing more that I want...Wrap me in all coldness,hold me,don't stop until I’m gone...Let me feel your cold touch,feel you,feel pain all over my body...Release my soul from your existence.release my soul and curse me to darkness. Darkness falling down upon an open bleeding slab. Piercing through the night like nothing ever has .Slipping smoothly through all the cracks For which were never really known .A cold damp darkness that once felt can never be removed The dark of sadness that pierces ever wound .And as i crash upon a hollow ground,All i ever knew begins to fade beyond my sight Stealing away all happiness and joy from my eyes .This is a place where such a happiness cannot exist. A place where the darkness never loosens its strong grip.Where all hope of ever escaping is lost to an empty nothingness,Where the only thing that ever falls besides myself Is a storm of tears falling to an empty ground Forever falling through the night Without the smallest glimmer of sunshine A darkness only known by those who has been cursed by you and your crimson lies.

black..

It is this rain the responsible of my acts. I am animal that exceeds of the pure beings, i am a mist that runs over the wisdom without realizing. To destroy me it is necessary the truth, and to create me a lie, to love me it is necessary to come up to the infinite, and to hate me only it is necessary to understand my lament. It is the distress that fixes to itself in my chest the selfish suffering of an ignoramus, is the shade of what was defenseless and the cruel reality of those of my species. I am happy because at least I know my destination, nevertheless the cigars have it uncertain. I am wretched because I love what hurts me, a weak one because I leave myself to go of the lusts, a wise one because I know when to be quiet, absent-minded because it is easy to wrap me, useless because I have no reason to exist. Those who speak my language me will understand, but those who are of strange languages will have for that to wait. At the end of my sorrows, quite this when for ending, put to desist from my egocentrismo and to give up suddenly what I have inherited from the darkness. If I can see further than this barred up window, I can view all that is before me.Sometimes I cannot hear past the walls that are enclosing my surroundings.If I can feel the life infused within me again, will I truly be free?If I can signifiy my mood, I would not need words to descibe it.But when I'm out of my cell, I want you and everyone to see that i still survive.

porajoy

Jiboner kach thekey lenden bujhey niye premikar shobtuku bishash baji rekhey
Firay jabey shob hara ekjon ajratey, alo adharir chuye , firay jabey juar table ey ekjon bibagi,
aj sob porajoy mene niye,fire jabe ekjon bebagi

"james"

What's worse? Feeling pain, or feeling numb? Feeling that someone betrayed you or someone has forgotten you? I pick the latter choice of the two.Nothing is worst than being left with nothing. Nothing is worst than being left with 'everything'. Where should we stand? It's hell both ways, but even "hell" has degrees.Crying in anguish is so much better than crying in void. Seems like the walls have grown fists and now they're choking.The memories are gone. I tried to remember, but they were blurred, and I stuttered a thousand times trying to bring them to life. 'Yes, you're not my muse anymore, but you're a part of me and I don’t want to lose that.' I think I might have an advice to give on how to be 'insensitive'.

Abbhorent Desolation..

In the corner beside my window
There hangs a lonely photograph
There is no reason I'd never notice
A memory that could hold me back
There is a wound that's always bleeding
There is a road I'm always walking
And I know you'll never return to this place
Gone through days without talking
There is a comfort in silence
So used to losing all ambition
Struggling to maintain what's left
Once undone, there is only smoke
Burning in my eyes to blind
To cover up what really happened
Force the darkness unto me..Amen

She went away, and I'm here to stay, forever in this decaying cell. Trapped between myself and myself. And you ask me why my eyes would cry bitter blood tears. Why I would lament a god-willed state. A forfeit I shall be, and accept this as my fate.A wreath is ecclesiastical on my head, preaching me of its inevitable symmetry and unyielding diligence. A foreseeable perdition of what is yet to come, and how life will end with no regard of how it withered to ash and dust. "You believe the eyes only venture once when lastly glazed, as I take you under my wings of eternal slumber. But I am in every dismal face, devouring pieces of the fragile soul. I take your pain onto me; your mortal loss is solely my gain. Into my hollow valley, you find your remains. So why fear me as life passes you by if the moment you're born you begin to die?i suffer for you..

Tears....

After the lightened haze, she turned her head to be locked in a box of velvet bricks. Walls so thick, cannot hear the sobs of this wretched detachment — desolation bleeds out the eye. So cold, yet soothing; this deadly peace in which She abides. Her home of mirror loathing. A self-constructed castle of fabrications. Beyond are Smiles of paint, sighs of concealed impatience.
They say time passes quicker when you're happy. The laughter would carry it away, without brushing you with its breeze…and you simply would not notice. I suppose, if that's true, then time would be heavy and thick when you're sad.Yes, I agree… I don't know much about happiness –and that is because I tolerated being bleak- but I know that sadness is savored, not only felt…that is why some people would hang on to their heartrending memories. Another thing is … I don't think people can take pain for granted, but they seem to have a habit of doing just that with blissful moments. I felt time going slow once, now… even with the burdens I bear, time is going fast. What would that mean? …I'm just being the anomaly that I am? or that "my mask of sanity is about to slip".I don't know how things are moving too fast, but Death's Arrow runs faster than lightening...

Better to have loved and lost

They say "Better to have loved and lost", a condolence to a broken heart.I scorn their resignation… I say "better to never have loved, then you wouldn't have lost".When you're alone again, all you'd have is memories searing your senses, not empathizing with your loss. The sweet turns bitter, and the bitter turns worse… and you're left to struggle with the pain."Love" never gives the promise of forever. It's us who do all the talking, like you're bound to say what your mind sows for you, no matter how high it is with all the confusing frenzy.Then, when it’s all clear, you wake up with the worst hangover of your life, not knowing what hit you. Karma works its magic."Better to never have loved" …maybe the resignation is mine.

Walk With Me

Walk with me, the path of life,to explore every bend of the road. Enjoy with me the beauty of life,along its wonderful way Find comfort with me, in each other's arms,when grief crosses our path.Find strength with me, in each other's strength,when despair lies in wait Laugh with me, a single true laugh,to enlighten another's distress.Cry with me, a single true tear,to understand true happiness Cherish with me, the wonders of life, as they need to be preserved.Rejoice with me, in the mysteries,of what is yet to be.Find peace with me, in each other's souls,when the world has gone insane. Find love with me, in each other's hearts,until this life has been fulfilled And when the path comes to an end. I hope we can say from within We've known the beauty of true love,our love came from within.AMEN

Existence

She doesn't exist in this world, only beyond the surface of the cold screen. She doesn't exist. And I hate that I compare her to all beings when put to test. How crude and tedious they become, and how she would silently suffer in isolation. But she's not real; I am yet to convince myself. I need her, but she's of my own creation, I give her the pulse, the silence in which she mesmerizes me. I make her tragic, and alluring but I can't feel her warmth. Only blankly stare where she resides. Beyond the screen. Inside my imaginations.

Agonistic Spirit

Thinking of you acid rain falls or are those tears which burns fiery paths of hurt down myface and on my neck. where I can't swallow or breathe . canthis choking be my end? Yes but the pain has just begun as the heart thirsts for love but only soaks in anguish. which drains it of life tearing a jagged scar. a raw wound open and screeching , echoing through a tortured mind ,then time is the enemy.All that remainsis a skeleton of agonistic spirit ,singing a haunting melody -"I'll lOVE YOU TO THE BITTER END "

Just a Little Longer

Desolation,Wide open space,Between the trees and me,Emptiness and me,Confusion and decisions,Feelings hard to define,And I say to myself,Just a little longer.Coldness seeps Its way in,I am falling deeper,Into what I fear most,As I reach out,There is nothing there,As possible there was something once,Only to be gone,And I say to myself,Just a little longer.The sun drops,The last inch of light falls,The squirrels more likely to be huddled up,But not me,Something I never possessed.And I say to myself,Just a little longer.Then the sun has gone.Darkness spreads its wings over me.I see nothing so no one sees me,Feeling of bitterness only,And I say to myself,Just a little longer. An Owl peers down,With question in her eyes,She doesn't have a hope,In helping me,As she doesn't see my pain,Spreads her wings,Passes me by,And I say to myself,Just a little longer.The soft earth,Seems the only thing holding me up,Even then I could slip,And wondering takes me,To why and how I got here,Without even knowing it,Yet no one notices,As they didn't see before,So I say to myself,Just a little longer. Shimmering in the darkness,I see two moons,Reflecting off a stream of thoughts,Ongoing forever more,Along a rocky road,Slowly giving in to finding a way out,I take the plunge under the river,Then the wind carries a whisper,Gently on a breeze,'Just a little longer.'

Mistake

I must admit that I have often thoughtof leaving it all behind and letting everything go I was lost and alone, as I always am,So many people around me,Yet no one seems to care.They say they understand and love me very much,But just when I Trust to love, they forget and move on.I held the knife so close as tears, mixed with blood,Began to fall slowly.Like a foolish child I cried.Knowing that I could end it all nowmade my mind draw a blank.I put the knife away and tried to wipe the blood,that ran faster than I can describe.I knew suicide wasn't the answer I was looking for.I knew there was a reason for me being alone.So many bad things happening at once -They can make you forgetAbout the good qualities of life.Even though life is hard,and trouble an inevitable part of it.If you decide to leave it all behind,maybe you will,but I can guarantee that others ....Your Mistake will haunt

Confessions

Silence Only tears As I press the blade Against my pale skin Red The blood flows From the wounds Echoing my inner pain SatisfactionAs I feel the knife Slicing into me .I only deserve pain Anguish As I realize what I've done I feel accomplishment. As I gaze at the marks upon my skin.People are horrified Don't understand why Neither do I.

Death Not Being The Way

I held the knife so close to my heart.Like a foolish child I sat and I cried,Didn't realize what I had done, what I had tried.Tears mixed with blood, falling slowly to the ground.Covered in blood, pulled myself up, in tears scribed:"To those who don't care, to those who can't see,Never Give up always thrive to be free."Didn't know how many people would later cry."Tried to be free, yet I see this isn't the way."Friend at the door, ran as fast as he could.Too weak to say I'm sorry, otherwise I would.In tears, looked at the blue sad day.When you come and see this pool of blood and me,This isn't the way my life was meant to be.

Darkness

I'm swimming all alone in a pool of darkness and I feel like darkness is slowly pulling me under,I yell for help but no one is there to hear it.I begin to see the water at eye level and I kick and fail fighting to stay above the darkness,But the darkness won't let go of its hold on me and I slowly begin to give into the feeling that lies below the water line .The waters starts to fill my lungs, the lungs that once held so much life,yet now they allow the murky water to replace.I know that this path doesn't lead to happiness,But why doesn't someone grab my hand & pull me from darkness's grasp? because no one knows I stand at the boundary ,the boundary between light and dark.So I give in to the thing that holds me.All of the strength and all of the courage that I once held in my heart can't save me from the water.So I slowly slip below the world of dead undetected by the occupants of your world. I don't want to fight anymore.I've given into darkness .

Birth of a New Star

After along fight between my silence and my wish to expression...the later won today..this is what i wanted to do.. a lil space to reclaim my life. a lil space to just share myself..
To tell all I have inside of me,
To read how ever it takes
Turn around and make a wish
Before you see my crying face...
Welcome to my blog.
Look around and think about what you read
Inside every person hides a deeper love for the darker things of life
Read my mind and see how sometimes some one can think about life, love and hurting
It's my mind, my thoughts
I'll give you a seek into my heart